Thursday, June 18, 2009

Distractions...

I find myself constantly distracted these days. I find that, whatever I'm doing, I'm constantly thinking about something else that I could be or should be doing. I'm not only the distracted by squirrels (go see the movie Up - seriously, stop reading this now and go see it...), I find myself going way out of the way to find squirrels to distract myself with.

If I can focus 3-4 minutes at a time without a distraction, I accept it as God's grace - it does happen, but it seems like I'm getting sicker around this. While, by all external appearances, it seems like I'm living a normal life but no one knows the way my head rolls (bright light! - sorry...) - I just hate that I can't conjure the focus or the discipline to simply do one thing at a time and give myself completely to that one thing.

I am always doing multiple things at the same time (download complete; reboot! - sorry...) - if I could just stop driving and texting or driving and emailing and driving and eating and driving and thinking and driving and talking - well, I'm sure my life would be improved...

From applying the 12 steps and AA principles, I know this is all about character defects and fear. Funny how sometimes it just builds up into my life to a breaking point. It seems we're about to break now.

...again...

Chop wood, carry water...

Thank God for grace...

I love this program...

2 comments:

Syd said...

Amen about doing so much. I blogged about that the other day. I was rushing hither and yon to do...what?
Slowing down is much better for me and everyone else.

Mary Christine said...

It is absolutely ridiculous how much we do each day. There is no need for it, and yet, here I am, like a rodent on a wheel, spinning, spinning, spinning.