Saturday, June 27, 2009

Off the radar...

One of my least favorite things about sponsoring people - especially new people - is when they move from calling every day to dropping out of contact. My experience seems to be like most that I've known in AA in that this is seldom good news. They're either drinking, running and gunning, or have backed away from an AA solution - usually w/out finding another solution instead. Over the years, I've had dozens of these relationships.

I hate this.

I don't have a "standard" response - I pray about each situation with each person and have, variously, let them call if and when they want, gone chasing after them, asked around - on a good day, I just try to ask for guidance and then do what seems to be indicated.

I still hate this...

Philip (also here) has fallen off the radar. I'm supposed to meet him at my home group tonight but he's neglected calling the past 2 days - new behavior for him. I know where he is (locked up in a treatment program) but I don't have a means of calling him. I can imagine the litany of excuses he'll have - and, he's got some good ones.

He does have a life-threatening illness (besides alcoholism). It's inconvenient for him to arrange to call while he's locked up. He's one of the few he's hanging with who are trying to "do" AA. He has legal complications in his life that need attention.

But, for this moment, he's off the radar and I don't get that he has a prayer of getting sober unless he gets a spiritual solution to his alcoholism.

But, then, none of us do...

5 comments:

Steve E. said...

Much more than theories, Ed...the life situations speak to me. They are real, they are happy, sad, they have meaning in your life, my life, and the lives of others.

Thank you for a "Phil" update. Now THERE is a peep I know without having met him--or you.
S

Prayer Girl said...

I have come to believe that 'a spiritual solution' is the only one there is for alcoholism and everything else.... AT LEAST FOR ME!

God bless you in all your sponsorship efforts and God bless Philip.

Prayer girl

Mary Christine said...

Hope Phil shows up tonight and can get back on track.

Scott W said...

I know that feeling. Leave one feeling a little empty.

dAAve said...

Of course, I know those feelings too. it's sad.
But guess what ... I'm still sober.