Tuesday, February 2, 2010

What's up...

I have no real excuses for not having posted the past few days.  I just haven't made the time to do more than read and comment.  I generally seem to much prefer that to writing my own entry these days.

My life since Thursday (my last post) has been too much self and too little thought of God and others.

The activities have included:
  • working on my computing environment and making a commitment to learn some things I've been skating on (just sort of not committing to really learning about and improving my network but hating the problems and patching together a framework which sort of works, some of the time) for over 2 years
  • my wife had an AA deal in Buena Vista, CO (about 4 hours from here - lives up to it's name) on Saturday night and we had a gorgeous drive over there
  • some wonderful folks there put us up for the night but I had to fly to NYC on Sunday morning so we had a gorgeous drive back over the mountains in a wonderful full moon early Sunday
  • I arrived in NYC on Sunday afternoon and got to walk around the upper west side and experience some of what I love (the people) and what I hate (all those people in a small area) about NYC
  • I interviewed for a voluntary position there Monday afternoon and learned that the fact that the interview didn't come off well had precious little to do with me - I gave, I thought, a pretty good interview but the fact that the people who will make the decision were not there (along with other factors which might weigh against me) mean I will probably not be offered the job/service opportunity - that could well be a very good thing...
  • I flew home last night and got home more tired than I'd like but I will get over it
During that time, I had plenty of time and opportunity to write an article but didn't.

My life feels like it's in a (major?) transition.  I've hesitated to put this observation down in a blog article because it's felt like that for over a year now (it's part of what brought me to writing here in the 1st place).  It just seems like I'm ready to cease fighting and let go of whatever resistance I have but I can't, for the life of me and with all the inventory and honesty I can muster get to anything I can do.  Writing this, I realize I'm just frustrated - yet more manifestations of selfishness and ego.

At the very least, I'm here for now (did you notice? ;-) ) and that is all I've got.

Now, it's on to the next thing...

Thank you.

p.s. the pictures are the best view I got of midtown (I think) from the cab on the way to LGA and Union (I think) on the way out Monday night.


dAAve said...

Hold your breath and see what happens next.

Thanks for checkin' in.

Mary Christine said...

I was beginning to wonder where you went :)
Glad you won't be moving to NYC. But, oh, how I can relate to wondering what is around the next bend! Surely it must be something good.

Carol said...

Good to hear from you again.

Garnet said...

When I'm waiting for what's around the corner, every phone call excites me. Could this be the news that will change everything?

And then it isn't, and I'm still the same old me.

Ho hum. Change will come.
Or it won't, because it don't.

Yes, I'm a poet laureate today.

Syd said...

Funny thing as I just wrote about my own selfishness today. Methinks that I over analyze things just too much--on here and in my head. Glad that you are back.